a creative Halloween costume...

Imagine the copy room...before school...on Halloween...

VCVB: Where's your costume?

Me: I'm going on a field trip this afternoon...didn't think I should go to the library dressed up. What about you?

VCVB: Well, I was going to wear a low-cut shirt and be Miss Anonymous, but...

I just stared at her. Dumbfounded. She did the awkward, joking laugh. I walked away, biting my tounge to keep from saying something really nasty.

Of course I couldn't let it go...the next day I wore a tighter, lower-cut sweater and my knee-high boots. It was a lovely time.

I'm going to...

Lunch today...

An older teacher shared with us that one of his students referred to a "love muscle" during a speech. Shocked, I asked if he gave the student credit for the speech. He answered that, in fact, he did. I told him I wasn't sure I'd feel comfortable doing that, and I probably would've sent him out of the room.

Very conservative (very bitchy) teacher: Why wouldn't he give credit for that?

Me: with a dumbfounded look Do you know to what the student was referring??

VCVB: Well, yes. His heart.

Me: Um. No. His penis.

At which VCVB got up and left the table in a huff. That's what she gets for thinking I'm a whore because I wear knee-length boots with my skirts.