Sunday, December 10, 2006

a very hateful, very cowardly comment.

The other day I received a comment that actually made me cry. I opened my email, read it, re-read it to make sure I'd read it correctly the first time, then I cried. Boyfriend head couldn't figure out what made me so upset. All I could do was point at the screen and cry when he asked me.

This is what had upset me so much: *Link to original post*
Concerned - said...

I'M AMAZED -- BUT MORE ASHAMED OF YOU TEACHERS. YOU SHOULD ALL QUIT TEACHING -- BECAUSE IT'S YOUR LOUSY BITCHING ATTITUDES THAT COME SHINING THROUGH TO OUR CHILDREN. THE PROBLEM IS NOT THE PARENTS... IT'S THE TEACHERS -- MOST OF THEM DON'T HAVE THE PATIENCE OR KINDNESS NEEDED FOR CHILDREN... AND SHOULD PICK ANOTHER INDUSTRY. **EVERY TIME** A TEACHER BITCHES ABOUT STUDENTS AND PARENTS... SHOWS JUST WHAT KIND OF PERSON THEY REALLY ARE... GROW UP -- YOUR WORSE THAN THE CHILDREN AND THE PARENTS YOU COMPLAIN ABOUT.

I couldn't believe anyone could write something that hateful. Once I got over the initial shock, I was angry. I wanted to know who could be mean-spirited enough to say something like that. I went straight to my sitemeter. Obviously it couldn't tell me who this person was, but I do know that s/he found my blog by searching "bad teacher blog" on Google. But because of the anonimity of the internet, this is all I know.

I think if someone feels this strongly about something, the s/he would at least sign a name...leave an email address? Something to allow me to respond to his/her allegations. So, I'm doing it in the only way I can...Right here:

Dear Hateful, Cowardly Commentor,
  • I think just about everyone at some point or another complains about his/her job. Teachers are human, too. We have our bad days the same as anyone else, and I think we deserve to complain occasionally. Teenagers and their parents aren't the easiest to deal with sometimes. I apologize if this offends you, but my advice then is don't read my blog...or any others that may offend you.
  • I love my job. Yes, it is at times overwhelming, and the parent/teacher conferences I had were a nightmare...but I wouldn't give up my job for anything. I love working with my kids. My students tell me how much they appreciate my positive attitude and my smiles, so I'm pretty sure my "lousy bitching attitude" isn't shining through to anyone except for possibly the rude parents I was referring to in my blog post...and to be honest, with some of them, I hope it did...because their rude, disrespectful, condescending attitude came shining through to me.
  • If you think you have enough "patience and kindness" to be an effective teacher, then go ahead. We need more teachers who possess those qualities, and despite what you may think, those are two things we have in abundance in my classroom.
  • If you were referring to the other teachers who'd commented on that particular post, then shame on you for using my blog as a place to insult my visitors.
  • If you were attempting to make a point, it was lost on me. What I gathered from what you wrote is that you're a hateful person who has entirely too much time on your hands. If you'd like me to take your opinion seriously, then I suggest you be less insulting and actually attempt to say something...because all I see in that comment is nastiness, and why should anyone take someone so nasty seriously?
  • The next time you want to post a nasty comment on my blog, do two things for me, please: 1.) Grow some balls and leave some sort of identification (name, email, etc.)--pardon my crudeness. and 2.) When commenting on an English teacher's blog, at least attempt to show some sort of grasp of grammar and mechanics. As I tell my students, it's very difficult to take someone's opinion seriously when it's riddled with grammatical and syntactical errors.
Thanks,
AT

20 comments:

leesepea said...

Would hate to think what Cowardly would say about my rantings!

Can I just say that the only thing that bugs me more than all-caps messages are all caps-messages in which the author cannot tell when it is appropriate to use "you're" instead of "your"?

Students are like Doritos. We can bitch all we want, but there'll still be more.

It is far more appropriate to use your blog as a creative outlet for your frustrations than it is to demean or otherwise ridicule the students. Their lives are complicated enough without snide remarks, which is exactly why I blog - if I didn't have a dumping ground for all of my thoughts I'd never sleep and would go insane.

M said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
M said...

"It's" rant didn't make me think. "It" didn't make me sit up and take notice. "It" didn't make me check the error of my ways. "It's" comment had just enough hate and malice that it just make me think that "It" was obviously ignorant. And I don't mean ignorant in the philosophical 'It just doesn't know any teachers' way - I mean s/he's really fucking dumb - as in a few brain cells short. It couldn't even find the caps button to turn it off for fucks sake!!

the anonymous teacher said...

Leesepea, You've summed up how I feel perfectly. Can't stand all-caps. And all-caps usually means horrific grammar/syntac problems...another pet peeve. I try to be as kind as possible to my students, and I don't want to use Boyfriend head as a punching bag when I get home at night, so like you, I use my blog to vent. Maybe that makes me a horrible teacher, but I personally think it makes me a better teacher because I don't say these things to the students or their parents.
And, M, my students and I just had a discussion of what the word "ignorant" means...and I tend to agree that this commentor is ignorant, and not in the forgiveable way.

rabi said...

oh, jeez. that you actually gave this a calm and reasoned response proves you are a more patient person than I.

sometimes venting frustrations with other teachers is necessary to prevent those feelings from coming out in front of the kids, I think. I know that I always try to be as fair & thoughtful towards them as I can -- because I love them -- but sometimes that takes effort!

I wonder if this person would tell all the parents who have ever been annoyed with their children that they should also quit.

M-Dawg said...

Good for you for venting your frustration and feelings in a healthy way.

The comment was rude and written by a coward - that person has NO CLUE on what we deal with on a daily basis. If they think it's easy, why don't they become a teacher???????

Hang in there and keep on smiling!

8th year High School History teacher aka M-Dawg :-)

CoyoteMom said...

These are the kinds of things that make me WISH I had become a teacher. I still think about it from time to time. I see what teachers have to go through and for someone to still remain dedicated to educating the youth of today. . . my hats off to you. to the anonymous comment - you know it's probably from someone who is the parent of a troublemaking teen or was one and refuse(s/d) to take responsibility and instead points fingers elsewhere. Ignorant indeed!

teachergirl said...

AT: Hate to think what the coward would say about my Thursday 13 list. So sorry you got dumpped on. My blog and my list are like my teammates. If I couldn't dump on them, I would just implode or explode on my family and friends. Not fair to them, right?

Teaching is one of the hardest things in the world to do. Balance is hard to come by and parents are the hardest people in the world to deal with. Now that I am a parent, I really sympathize with the teachers I am dealing with. PrepGirl has decided that high school is going to be hard. So, now that I am her mom and a teacher and the parental unit at her school, I have all these emotions to deal with and so do her teachers. Reading the coward's comments always help me realize that I absolutely cannot be the asshole. Must. Be. The. Adult. Must teach my child that there are many lessons to be learned.

My favorite teacher in the entire world once told me that the only way to have fabulous students was for them to have fabulous parents. I have found this tidbit to be completely true. The coward's children must be hell on wheels in the classroom. And maybe that's what is wrong with the coward.

Sorry to ramble. Just in shock that anyone would anonymously e-mail you with that load of crap. Keep doing the great job you know you are doing.

Monica said...

I thought the comment was amusingly hypocritical; "Concerned" can't show patience or kindness toward an adult, I'd hate to see him/her interacting with a child. Wildly ironic, too, the line about "bitching attitudes." Who's doing the bitching again?

AT-- no worries. Teachers are heroes and role models-- not only to their students, but to the teachers-to-be who read their blogs. ;o)

Lsquared said...

My reaction upon reading this is that I'm glad you are anonymous, because this person sounds really mentally unbalanced, and I'd feel very nervous if this guy knew where I lived...

You sound like a fine teacher to all of us sane people out here!

Dennis Fermoyle said...

AT, don't let the knucklehead stop you from venting now and then. I enjoyed your post that drew the comment. To plagiarize that commercial, the poor guy probably just got up on the wrong side of his rock.

Jennie said...

Sheesh, some people can't help but feel they know everything can they? Great job with the reply. Teaching is one of those professions that everyone has such strong opinions on (I mean, would anyone ever tell a lawyer/doctor/scientist that complaining about the job means they're not qualified?) that it's hard to even speak about the profession without being inundated with advice--often all in caps!
To put it more succinctly, what an ass!

Deb S. said...

You can vent to me anytime. I'm sorry you received such a hateful comment anonymously.

I work directly with teachers every day. Unless someone has walked in your shoes, they have no idea what hoops you jump through on a daily basis.

By now, I would hope that your sadness and anger went straight into the trash bin - along with the email message.

Your work speaks for itself. Be encouraged.

http://mediabysistrunk.blogspot.com

Jules the Crazy said...

i completely agree with everyone else---shame on the cowardly asshole! indeed, you could not get a better textbook definition of hypocritical. i loved your response--way to kick some anonymous ass! i hope all the cowardly commenters learn a lesson from you and never strike again! keep up all your great work at school and on the blog.

the anonymous teacher said...

Thanks to all the comments. I considered ignoring the comment, but I felt I should at least have a chance to defend myself even if the anonymous commentor will never see it.
I agree with Jennie. Very few people actually tell other professionals how to do their jobs, so I don't know why people feel they're qualified to teach...and if they feel they're such experts, why aren't they in the profession?

rookie teacher said...

Hey Anon Teacher,

Next time you get a hateful comment like that DON'T CRY! You're doing a great job. You know it. Your colleagues know it. Most importantly your kids know it. You don't need to justify yourself to some random stranger who came up with a profile just so they could reply to your post. They are clearly not satisfied with whatever it is they are doing in life so feel the need to take a cheap shot at someone they don't even know.

elementaryhistoryteacher said...

I'm sorry you had an unpleasant experience. I have also had my share of anonymous comments and mail that was not necessary or appreciated. It has already been said here, but I will say it as well....venting in our profession is necessary. By allowing our colleagues to see we are upset and having a problem we can share experiences as well as possible solutions to whatever is causing the stress. It also is a huge stop gap that prevents us from lashing out at the kids.

I enjoy your posts greatly. I believe we all understand that from time to time we will run across a post that is over the top in our opinion. Rather than demean or ridicule the author we should be supportive....if we can't be supportive we should just hit the "next" button. Even if we disagree there is a way to do it without making the situation worse. Apparently your "anonymous" doesn't see it my way.

Alyndabear said...

I'm a first time lurker here, and as a primary school teacher, reading that horrible letter made me cringe. Some people just have NO idea.

I've had one person leave a nasty comment before, but thankfully? Most people actually have a brain.

I love your writings, and I just got here.

The Educational Tour Marm said...

There was as nasty a comment left recently on another blog from an anonymous administrator. it was an outrageous comment.

I was so upset with it, that I defended the author of the blog (an excellent teacher).


While I am no longer a classroom teacher, I have directly experienced the negative impact some parents and administrators have upon the students and teachers. Personally, I think that parents are 80% of the problem.

With all the rules; regulations; internal and external interruptions; and teachers being micro-managed by everyone, is it any wonder that we are losing good teachers?

I don't see why this forum shouldn't serve as a support network.

Now, now. Wipe your eyes, have some hot cocoa, and feel sorry for ignorant people.

Just get on with what you do best, teaching and inspiring!

The Tour Marm

mcisrae said...

HAHAHA!LOL! I CAN'T HELP BUT LAUGH AT THIS INSANE COMMENT THAT THIS SUPPOSEDLY CONCERNED PERSON POSTED ON YOUR BLOG. I'm just joking. I can find a caps lock key and turn it off or on when appropriate. As a teacher education student and a future teacher, I am proud to say that I can use a keyboard properly and use standard written grammar. You know, I am willing to bet this "concerned" person didn't spend four or more years in college to prepare for a profession. This person apparently has an inability to think and be rational. First of all,"I'M AMAZED--BUT MORE ASHAMED OF YOU TEACHERS" doesn't make any sense. "Amazing" is generally used as a positive connotation. Also, most people spend thousands of dollars on their education in universities. We would be crazy if we entered a profession knowing that we didn't qualify or have the heart to do it. Teaching is a completely self-less career, and all teacher candidates probably know that upon entering teacher education school. If they don't,it only takes one education class to have that fact drilled into your head. You are definately right. Teachers are human also. Maybe what "concerned" needs is a definition of "blogging", and a clarification of it's intended purpose. Blogging is essentially an online diary in which to express your thoughts and feelings so that you don't EXPLODE. oops. Caps-Lock. I turned it off. In my opinion, you handled the situation very calmly, just as a professional should. I just like to keep in mind that I had hundreds of professions to choose from. It doesn't matter if I had chosen to be a doctor, a lawyer, a nurse,or a pilot. There would still be something to complain about. I believe that it is emotionally healthy for professionals to vent their frustrations(to each other) in a professional manner. In fact, I have read some nurses' blogs, and they are very similar to teachers' blogs. Don't take it personally. The fact is, you are the professional and you have the facts. The fact is, teachers do care and have patience and kindness, and they would be crazy to enter this profession without it. Teacher Education school can help us determine those qualities. Teachers can't possibly teach everyone, just as doctors and nurses can't save all of their patients. It is a sad fact of life, and our intentions are the best but it doesn't always work out the way we want it to. I'm sorry this person hurt you feelings, I would've been hurt too. "Concerned" is just another person who has no idea what is going on, so just ignore him/her. Best of luck with future comments on your blog. =)